Going Beyond Life Coaching
In Corrogue the air is chill and the frost is on the ground.
On these autumn mornings the spider’s webs are glistening like each was arrayed with diamonds. The red berries of the holly stand out against the dark green of their shining leaves. It is a time simply to look and be glad at the wonder of this creativity. It is a time simply to stand and stare.
Like many people I receive unsolicited mail. This is by ordinary post and by email. Yesterday I received, via the post, a letter inviting me to train as a “Life Coach.” As a writer on “being enough” I reflected on what it is to have the need for a “Life Coach.”
In this “Type A” society life coaching might compound the problem of “doing more” and “being less.” So I share with you what I see as the blessing of life beyond coaching. This is not to invalidate wonderful work that many dedicated individuals bring to this profession out of a sense of love and compassion.
1. You are a “being.”
In this rush into the noise and haste of this 21st Century we forget we are “human beings.” Life Coaching that takes you away from this essence takes you further from “life.” It may take you further into “doing your life.” This may mean you achieve more. You may be more successful. You might achieve more goals, but you might also miss. You might miss this extraordinary blessing of simply being alive. You might miss the journey and only ever be focused on arriving.
2. You already know “life.”
You are a mystery. You are unique. No one knows you better than yourself. In this respect you are all knowing. You need to start to trust this. You need to start to trust in the process. Be the one who knows. We are taught throughout our lives to accumulate knowledge. We put aside our “inner telling sense” to be filled up with rational thought alone. You are already the expert. You do not need more knowledge of how to do. You need to be more and do less. The paradox is that in learning to be more you are able to do more in less and less time.
3. You are beautiful.
Take time for beauty. Beauty is not a function of goal setting and time management. Beauty is your essence. If you miss this essentialness then you truly miss. No amount of “life coaching” will compensate for a life of achievement alone. Beauty is where you belong. It is your birthright. There is nothing you need to do in order to realise this. As the sage Lao Tzu advised. “The way to do is to be.” This is productive beyond measure because it is magical.
4. You are at one.
You are already at one. You are a whole and holy being. This sense of oneness is available at all times. Constantly “doing” your life will only take you further from the real life. This is the gift of knowing that you and life are not separate. You can never be separate from life. Thinking that we are separate from life is like a fish in the ocean looking for the experience of water. We need more relaxation into letting go rather than adding to our ever-increased requirement for achievement.
5. Be surrendered.
This is the ultimate life skill in this 21st Century. It is the ultimate skill in any century. Just let go. Do not let the sense of ego rule your being. Do not add to this sense of attachment to this illusion of who you think you are. Otherwise you are always living your life second-hand. Simply learn to give yourself way. Give your love for no reason. Be more unreasonable. Come to your senses. Come back to a little more common sense and a lot more awareness of the beauty of your body. Leave the rational awhile. It is only ever a part of the wholeness of who you are.
6. Be Enough
I remind people all the time that they are “forever enough.” This is the reality of life that is lived first hand. You can improve your life situation but you cannot improve upon the first hand experience of life. If you are troubled in life it usually means you are not living first hand. You are living past or future ideas of what life will be or was. There is little or no presence. This life has been gifted to you. You had nothing to do to be gifted it. In every moment it is enough if you know how to receive it. If you can look and see through an open heart then you will come to know. Just for a little while each day stop “trying.” Sit and breathe in and out. Going nowhere all is achieved. It takes time to build this trust. Yet we need to begin.
7. Be grateful
Practice gratitude. This is a great attitude of being. People who teach motivation focus on developing this practice. The right attitude brings results. Only the first attitude is that of being. Out of this attitude all else arises. One is simply the experience of gratefulness. One is simply the experience of celebration. This is life. This is not “your life” dependant on outcomes. It is only the moment-to-moment flow of this gift of life that we are freely given. It is the free flow of the energy of love. When you know this you go beyond. This experience of life is then “beyond belief. It is beyond “Life Coaching.”
Beyond coaching means dropping rather than accumulating. It means commitment to the experience of being in the present. It means dropping attachment to “your life” in order to live. It is to live life non-separate from love. One moment will be enough because you are forever enough.
Blessings upon you from Corrogue – the place of the briars.